Valley Forge (1975)

Valley Forge (Fielder Cook, 1975)

Walken plays: Major Calvin - Hessian, military defector, connoisseur of chicken, horses, and brandy



Synopsis: It's a shame that, particularly in the wake of the recent rampant popularity of Hamilton, this 1970s TV movie adaptation of Maxwell Anderson's play (yup, eagle-eyed readers: the same guy who wrote Walken's debut, Barefoot in Athens!) has become so seemingly impossible to find (once again, I was only able to find Walken's scene on YouTube). Part of the Hallmark Hall of Fame series of TV specials on American history, Valley Forge details the struggles of the Continental Army encampment during the American Revolution at Valley Forge, Pennsylvania, with the forces of Generals George Washington (Richard Basehart), William Howe (Harry Andrews), and [give it up for America's favourite fighting Frenchman] Lafayette (Victor Garber) striving to escape the conflict before perishing amidst a brutal winter. Like Barefoot in Athens, Valley Forge looks to be somewhat of a talky but intriguingly sardonic costume drama, keeping the politics and social commentary of the incident priority above any shoehorned-in drama (apparently, the film, to trim down to a 75 minute running time, entirely omitted the play's only female character... ah, patriarchy).



Walken, playing his first of two Hessian soldiers (this time he keeps his head on), easily livens up the proceedings as Major Calvin, who Washington attempts to lure into joining their forces. Didja know: the Hessians were a force of 30,000 German troops sent by the British to help bolster ranks in the American Revolution, so the legend of Sleepy Hollow inherently riffs on historical fact. BAM - HISTORY! At any rate, this is the earliest of his work I've found yet - if not quite to the extent of 1977's Annie Hall - that really feels like a 'Christopher Walken performance'. Apart from the inherent joy in seeing him cavort around in a delightfully shoddy period piece uniform and wig, here, he slyly chews scenery with a subtly weird charisma, brazenly stalling and playing with Washington for his own personal military advancement. Most notably, Walken's (admittably, fairly awful) attempt at a German accent shows him playing with pauses, enunciation and inflection in his earnestly misguided attempt to nail a European cadence. Could this be the dawn of THE Christopher Walken voice, which we've already established is at least a fairly conscious construction??? You heard it here first, folks.

Wacky Walken dialogue: Walken's preening performance makes even his most mundane dialogue feel wacky in an American Revolution framework, but two bits in his all-too-brief scene stand out. His closing remark, "You are most hospital hosts. The chicken...was lovely. So FAT!" is pretty amusing, but it's his opening bit that really hammers the bonkers button. "Lieutenant...uh... Cutting, showed me the stables. You're a very good guide, Lieutenant. Very good. The stables are very nice stables. Very nice." I severely doubt Walken clued in to the obvious sexual tension in his delivery, but, like his infamous (and uncannily similar) 'Colonel Angus' SNL sketch, this only makes it all the funnier.



DOES HE DANCE: Nope - at least until an extended directors cut shows us exactly what went on in those stables. Va-va-voom.

Overall Walken-o-meter: 6/10 cowbells. It's a shame that it's impossible to determine how much Walken's staginess contrasts with the rest of Valley Forge, but his preening, conniving, prone to repetition Major here is a subtly irreverent treat, flirting with, but not flying off the Walken handle. And yes - it's enough to make me wish that Colonel Angus had been greenlit for a feature film debut of straight Civil War euphemisms. Not for the first time.